While reading Algernon's and Hal's blog I got stuck on the concept of insomnia, how it had affected my life, and pulled out an old poem. In the reread, I found it entirely too haunting and desolate... decided to offset it with another poem written in those early hours; one that more adequately describes the beauty of those pre-dawn hours. I hope you enjoy.
quid
Insomnia
Trapped in an endless pattern
Trying not to panic.
Sleepless world I’m in,
Silent, as the clock strikes 4 a.m.
Lifelong habit that has
Left me with permanent
Dark circles inhabiting my face,
Darker moods of exhaustion.
Herbs and drugs don’t
Help the pattern
Apparently, the only relief from
Anguish is to play-act.
I do. Meditating,
I convince myself that this “extra” time is
Valuable, special, a gift that
Very few people give themselves.
Permission to forgive myself lets me
Pretend to relax for years and then
Menopause arrives and brings with it
Many, many sleepless nights.
Insomnia.
Read the Stephen King book.
Watch the Al Pacino movie.
Finally succumb.
~quidrock 2003
Trapped in an endless pattern
Trying not to panic.
Sleepless world I’m in,
Silent, as the clock strikes 4 a.m.
Lifelong habit that has
Left me with permanent
Dark circles inhabiting my face,
Darker moods of exhaustion.
Herbs and drugs don’t
Help the pattern
Apparently, the only relief from
Anguish is to play-act.
I do. Meditating,
I convince myself that this “extra” time is
Valuable, special, a gift that
Very few people give themselves.
Permission to forgive myself lets me
Pretend to relax for years and then
Menopause arrives and brings with it
Many, many sleepless nights.
Insomnia.
Read the Stephen King book.
Watch the Al Pacino movie.
Finally succumb.
~quidrock 2003
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A Beginning
Crescent of light, lost
In swirling, violet mists
Evening’s mystery.
Could it be that the
Beginning of time is the here and now?
Tranquil, new, serene.
Brave dawn of the naked world
Magical light covers velvet dark
And silent secrets.
Together, we are
Privy to the silence, the mystery.
Our quest to match this
Miracle of time
Together, begins in a
Word, a look, a bond.
It is a beginning.
~quidrock 12/03
4 comments:
I love both poems, but the second is my favorite. It has a weightless, tranquil flow..upward.
I confess that insomnia is not something I'm familiar with on a personal basis.
I do know that there have been those times when I was up into the pre-dawn hours and I remember thinking there was something peaceful and magical about the cloak of solitude.
Very good early morning reading, thank you!
I also like both poems, but think I might like the first one best.
I always enjoy seeing your poetry here!
Quid,
I too, love both poems. But I feel strongly drawn to the beautiful images and the magic of those early hours which your second poem evokes.
Though your first poem is a powerful evocation of your struggle with insomnia.
Raven
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